Andre
As humans, we’ve all battled with the ‘holier than thou’ feeling that settles over your mind when you judge others. Judging people and things around us seems to be a coping mechanism to deal with the things that hurt our feelings or threaten our image.
We judge every day of our lives. The food we eat, the clothes we wear, the people in our lives; colleagues at work; friends at church; family members; friends; and even people who we’ve never met before.
That’s the irony of it. We form opinions about people without taking the time to get to know them or even understanding why they are the way they are or act the way they did. We know the act of judging others isn’t right, but we do it anyway. So how do we stop and break the cycle?
Good news! This article examines 7 psychologically proven ways to stop being judgemental on others. Before we look at tips to help us avoid the temptation of putting others under the microscope, let’s first understand why we judge other people.
Why Do We Judge?
The fact is, judging makes us feel better – better than others. Condemning others essentially elevates us above them. Psychologists believe that judging others makes us feel self-righteous, and it helps us feel better when we feel vulnerable and insecure.
In short, Judging makes us feel so much better. We think smarter, better experienced, savvier, more enlightened, healthier, or wealthier. If you’ve ever felt this way before, then you’re not alone. Now let’s consider effective ways to break free from the self-righteous habit of looking at others negatively.
#1 Understand The Other Person’s Point Of View
It’s almost impossible for us to look at what people did, especially people who are close to us. However, before we reach a conclusion or make a decision based on their actions, we ought to seek to understand why they acted or usually act the way they did. When evaluating others, you should make an effort to understand their perspective. This is how you avoid passing unfair judgments in people.
In a lot of cases, you’ll discover that people are going through things. And maybe, their actions and reactions were not totally because they don’t know as much as we thought they knew. There’s a range of factors that may affect people’s behavior, which you’re not aware of. We do not all have the same experience, background, education, and morals, which is why you want to be a bit patient with others. Also, consider what your attitude will be if you were to be in the same position as the other fellow. On a few occasions, you should reach out and discuss with them. There’s a probability that you’ll not need to judge them after all.
#2 You Could Lose Your Relationships
Judgemental people tend to have fewer people within their close circle. Being less judgemental towards people could actually help you bolster and strengthen your relationship with your friends and colleagues. Naturally, people hate to be around folks who often judge them or keep reminding them of their flaws and shortcomings.
Perhaps, you should also consider that you are not perfect yourself. That should help you time down in your judgment of others. Everyone on earth, whether they’re good or bad people, appreciate being around people who affirm them, and treat them with respect.
#3 Avoid Overly Judgemental people
As a way to protect yourself from picking up a judgment habit, you should stay away from people and friends who are often too critical. It’s natural for people to pick on other people’s character and personality when they spend time together. If you have friends who are always condemning others and their actions, chances are you’ll soon pick up the habit.
It’s best to surround yourself with people who bring along with them, positive vibes and energy. You may not realize it, but the more often you spend time criticizing people’s behavior and character, the more likely it is for you to develop a judgemental character. In simpler words, stop gossiping or avoid gossip partners.
#4 Think About How You’d Feel If It Was You
You already know how to stop yourself short just before falling into the trap of judging others. You could reinforce that action by reminding yourself of how it would feel to be on the receiving end.
Think about how your words and criticism would hurt the feelings or the emotions of the other person. You probably might drop the thought of judging them altogether.
Would you rather be the reason why someone else’s emotions hurt or why they have smiles on their faces? You should focus more energy on enjoying life and making others happy instead of spreading negative energy.
Even if you need to point out the other person’s wrong, there are very good and less critical ways of getting it done without hurting people’s feelings or eroding their image or self-esteem.
#5 Look For The Positive In Others
Once in a while, you should try to see for the better side of people instead of the side that irritates you. Consider judging your own self instead. Understanding how it feels could help you flip the process on its head.
The outcome of being judgemental is usually negative, but there’s always something nice you could find in someone. With practice, if you push your thoughts in a positive direction, you’ll most likely change your mindset and attitude.
#6 Don’t Pass The Judgment
The next time you catch yourself trying to pass judgment, stop yourself. This, of course, takes a greater awareness. To achieve this, you need to observe your thoughts and keep them in check e dry once in a while. This can be difficult, but if you actually mean to be less judgemental, you should commit to it.
#7 Forgive
Yes, that’s right. The temptation to judge often comes with a greater impulse than the willingness to forgive and let go. However, forgiveness is crucially important in your effort to a kid judging others. In fact, forgiving means you’re not going to hold it against them, whether they own up to their wrongs or not.
Conclusion
When it comes to getting less judgemental of other people, at the crux of the matter is the need to improve our relationship with others and reduce the spread of negative energy. It takes a bit of work and patience to master the art of looking the other way when you feel the need to judge someone.
